


Ash and Pale

by DragonGirlBoss



Series: NotAboutMyMainShip [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Multi, Nepeta Leijon - Freeform, Vriska Serket - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-05-14 22:06:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 7,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5760643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonGirlBoss/pseuds/DragonGirlBoss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John lives alone and gets his house broken into. Some how Eridan and Sollux ends up living with him until he recovers. What if they might want to stay? Would they? Why is John living alone? Who is this person he refuses to call Mother? Why is his aunt overbearing? What is even happening?</p><p>P.s. Andrew Hussie stole my soul and I don't care if I get it back anymore.</p><p>P.s.s. Disclaimer: HomeStuck is owned by the Huss!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Break In

\------------------------------------------------------------

A black haired boy slept comfortably in his bed as it very quiet. Soon he woke up. The silence was now a void. He stretched then sighed.

 

He made his bed and got ready for the day. Even though...the sun wasn't out just yet.

\-------------

He didn't eat breakfast, mostly because he never buys food. The fridge is always empty. He instead went out for a walk. That void was still there. But he ignored it, like he did with many things.

 

He didn't go to school, the last time he ever went to school....he almost died.

 

As people pass him, he smiles and waves. They ignore him, some bump into him and he falls.

 

No one helped, why would they? They don't have time to waste on a stranger.

\--------------------------------------

He came back to his house, before he ever opened the door. He got hit by a ball. His face slammed into the door.

 

"Sorry!"

 

He picked up the ball and smiled. He handed it back to the kids.

 

"It's okay. Just be careful."

 

They took off and went to play video games in one of the more far a way houses.

\--------------------

He slept soundless in his room. He was having a nightmare, his face was consorted in a upset look.

 

While he slept, his house was broken into. Quietly, the thieves looked a round for something to steal. The house bare, except for Harley Quinn dolls. The thieves found nothing on the ground floor and went up stairs for something that was valuable. Just more creepy dolls.

 

"UGH! Don't these people have have anything I can steal!?"

 

"Shh! They will wake up!!! Purretty please!"

 

One hushed the other. They nodded to each other and somehow ended up at a door at the end of the hall.

 

"This place is weird....empty and the only thing a round are creepy clown dolls..."

 

"Yeah...*AC shutters in disgust.*"

 

The other thief opens the door with an eye roll.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------

In the room....there were writings on the walls and sealing. The only thing besides that was a bed and a computer. One of the thieves motioned to the other to looked at the closet while they get the computer. It looks like it hasn't been used in a long time.

 

"Vriska......", the one looking in the closet whispered.

 

"SHUSH! Don't say my name! What if I said yours Nepeta?"

 

"I don't want them to pick me out!"

 

"Then don't-"

 

"P-please don't hurt me...."

\-------------------------------

**BYE!!!**


	2. Shot at from two ends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John has a nightmare and then gets shot.

\-----------------------------------------------------

They paws and look at each other. Slowly looking towards the bed and sweated. Luckily they had masks on.

 

"...No...Please...don't....please..."

 

They slowly came closer and saw...

 

"He's just sleep talking....phew..."

 

Nepeta looked at the boy. He had tears in his closed eyes and a frown. His next words were...

 

"Dad...please don't leave me...I'm sorry....I..."

 

He quickly jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. He puked in the toilet. Vriska and Nepeta ran to hide. The boy came back, he sighed and put his glasses on.

 

\-----------------------------------------

He won't be able to sleep now....

 

"...It was just a dream..."

 

He went to his closet as Vriska quickly went past him to another spot. He pulled out a white hat. He smiled sadly at it and then put it back. He then walked down stairs.

 

"Hey, I think we should pounce!"

 

Whispered a panicking Nepeta and Vriska nodded. Ditching the computer so they wont be slowed down. They tried opening the window. It was blocked. Vriska cursed under her breath and they had to go down stairs.

\-------------------------------

The boy was at a piano. He started to play as they decent down the stairs quietly. The song he played was sad and ....lonely.

 

They stopped a little and listened. It took a moment to realize he stopped and was staring at them from a cross the room. Vriska shot him on the side, she didn't want to kill him. She and Nepeta ran out of there. In the process they knocked down a picture frame.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------

**Bye! Sorry for shortness but whatever!**


	3. Shouting and Police, or Shouting Police

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John is in the hospital and he meets some every loud people when he wakes up. Loud angry people.

\-------------------------------------------

That morning, the boy woke up in a hospital. He looked a round, he only moved his head slightly.

 

"WWhy the fin do I have to wwork wwith a b!tch like you?"

 

"II ask my self the same thiing, @sshole!"

 

He heard voices as they get closer and it was coming from behind the curtain in front of him. They were arguing with each other.

 

"At least I can talk in more comprehensible wwords!"

 

"At least II don't look liike a tr@mp!"

 

"Hey! Wwhat I do in my free time has nothing to do wwith you!"

 

The boy is worried they might hurt each other and decides to step in, in a way.

 

"E-Excuse me? Is some one there?"

 

The voices stop and one pulls the curtain back. They were sweating, embarrassed some one was listening to them bicker unprofessionally. They clear their throats.

 

"Hello, Siir. II am offiicer Sollux Captor."

 

"I am Eridan Ampora, howw are you feeling?"

 

The boy smiled.

 

"My name is John."

 

"John....?"

 

"....Egbert, but you can call me John."

 

"Okay, John. We need to ask you a few thiings."

 

"Yeah, example....Wwhat happened to you last night?"

 

He thought it over and said.

 

"Two girl that had masks on were in my house. I think they were thieves. One shot me and here I am."

 

"II see....anythiing else?"

 

"No...may I please go now? I have to get home, I think they may have broken a picture frame on their way out of my house."

 

"Your house wwas broken into and you're wworried about a picture frame?"

 

Sollux elbowed him in the side. They glared at each other.

 

"Yep! It's one of the only things I have in my house that's important."

 

"Riight, the fiiles read that every thiing iin your house was mostly....Harley Quiinn dolls...a computer...and...a piiano. Plus the piicture frame. There was no food or anythiing else unless you count the bed and a few clothes."

 

"No food? You run out?"

 

"No, just never bought any....in a while."

 

John continued to smile, just not to big.

 

"Okay...well...do you have any reason as to why they broken iinto your house?"

 

"Nope!"

 

They start scratching their heads.

 

\-------------------------------------------

**BYE~**


	4. John gets house guests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John gets more questions and then someone calls Eridan....and it's NOT is mother. He gets calls from other people too....I swear! He has friends....Stop looking at me like I'm lying! I'm not! Geez.....

\------------------------------------

"Do you livve wwith anyone?"

 

"Nope."

 

"No relatiives?"

 

"....I do."

 

"Howw old are you?"

 

"Nineteen."

 

"Whale...you can't go home. Some one has to take care of you until you'vve healed."

 

"-And you can't go back to your house untiil iit's clearly not dangerous."

 

"..Hmm...I am not going to live with anyone I am related to. She will never let me out of the house ever. She is the most overbearing aunt I have and one of the only ones I consider family."

 

"What about the others?", said Sollux.

 

"The...only other one I have is...she is not my mother. I don't care it they say so legally."

 

"...Uh.....okay....."

 

Things just go heavy.......

 

"Well...you can pay your mediical biills and get a hotel?"

 

"...I can pay for it...it's just....never mind. Anyways, how did I get here anyways. Neither of you told me."

 

"Oh...that? It was no fin, just someone heard a gun shot and called the police."

 

"Okay."

 

John tried to get out of the bed and wobbled. Sollux held him steady.

 

"Careful! You are stiill healiing!"

 

Eridan's phone goes off with the ring tone "Bubble Up".

 

Sollux's smirks at him with a raised eye brow. Eridan glared with a blush.

 

"Shello? Chief? I sea...okay, Sir."

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------

 

"What diid Chiief say?"

 

"Wwhale....Looks like wwe're movving in John. At least until he is back on his fins."

 

Sollux groans and then remembers John is right next to him and smiles apologetically. John didn't get it and continued to smile innocently at him.

 

"John....IIs iit okay iif we liive wiith you for a whiile?"

 

"I guess....I don't see why though. Just...don't go into my room and it will be fine."

 

"Okay, got iit."

\----------------------------------------------------------------

 

John is soon discharged from the hospital and they make a stop at Sollux's apartment. 

 

"Piick me up after you're done packiing at your apartment EriiFxck. See you soon John."

 

Eridan gives him the bird and drives off, John smiles and waves at him.

 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**BYE~**


	5. Sollux Pov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look at title and tell me other wise. Nimrod.

\----------------------

Okay after they leave me, when I was half way up the stairs. I realized something.

 

_"OH MY GOG!"_

 

I then trip and fall down said stairs. It hurt....a lot. I groan with pain.

 

_Cr@p! II left John wiith EriiFxck! The poor kiids goiing to be harassed!_

 

Then I paused my thoughts to get up and up the stairs all the way.

 

_Now calm down. He iis useless and a desperate human beiing to begiin wiith but.... II have to trust hiim. Oh gog II'm goiing to be siick just thiinkiing that!_

 

I open my door and see all the computers I have to leave behind... a tear silently rolls down in sadness.

 

"II don't want to leave my babiies! But...SIIGH...II guess II have to deal wiith John's rusty old one...."

 

I shuttered at the thought of using and old piece of junk.

\-----------------------

 

I start packing my things. As I do, I spot a few portable laptops and tablets and computers....

 

"Oh yeah...II forgot II have a Sh!!t ton of computers....FXCK YEAH!"

 

\----------------------

 

I have to wait for them for three hours, I start worrying about John. Is he okay? That piece of sh!t isn't causing him discomfort is he? I sighed board completely. I had every thing set and I told my landlord what's up and she said she's put my things in a small store room. 

 

"Where are they?"

 

I saw them coming after I said that and when they pulled up to me. They were laughing, it took five minutes to stop.

 

"S-sorry, We made a s-stop on the way here...ha ha...", John said.

 

I get in the car.

 

"II can tell....II waiited about two or three hours."

 

"Again sorry...."

 

"IIt's fiine, you're here now."

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------

 

**BYE~**


	6. Eridan POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title, read it. Dumb dumb.

\----------------------------------

**(Back track)**

 

I just drove off, finally getting that Prick out of my hair. Well, now I have to get to my apartment and I am left with John....Whatever.

 

I pull up to my apartment building and ask John to stay in the car.

 

"I'll be right back."

 

"Okay."

 

\---------------------------------------------

 

I get in and right a way. I spot my aquarium. I go over to it, I see all the little fish I have in it. I feed them and get packing. 

 

"WWhere did it go?"

 

I said looking for my photo of my friend, Feferi. She's the daughter of a reely pretty yet scary business lady.

 

"Found it!"

 

Last I get my fish and head down. I was at the door when I saw my brother....oh gog....

 

I get close enough to listen to their conversation.

 

\----------------------------------------------------

 

"WWell?"

 

"I don't know...."

 

"Come on, Angel fish....."

 

"Cronus. Why are you asking me this? Shouldn't you be asking your brother?"

 

"WWhy wwould I ask him? You have a better connection to-"

 

"Excuses Excuses. Anyways, Eridan is coming."

 

"Fine, Chief. Fish ya later!"

 

He walks off as I come closer.

 

"John?"

 

"Hey!"

 

"WWhat wwas that about? Howw do you knoww my brother?"

 

"I just meet him, it's a thing called introducing your self. You've done it before."

 

"WWhatevver. WWhat did he wwant anywways?"

 

"He wanted me to ask some one he knows to give back him motor bike back. How am I suppose to do that?"

 

"It's impossible!"

 

"I know right?"

 

\-------------------------------

 

We decided that we where hungry and boring. Also so I can make that prick p!ssed, I suggested we watch a movie. It was.....Ghostbuster's two. It wasn't that bad, not my type of movie but okay. John managed to spill popcorn all over a huge and scary guy, that loomed over us.

 

"You punk!"

 

"I-I'm sorry! It was an accident, I'll help clean the mess! The popcorn had no butter, or salt and- and....."

 

He gulped. I tried to step in.

 

"Look, he said he wwas sorry! He evven offered to help clean! Uh....Gulp."

 

He was looking at me, I think I'm going to die....

 

"Wait! It was completely my fault! Don't be mad at him, please I'm sorry! Really I am!"

 

"What's going on?", said someone who work with the theater.

 

"This brat spilled popcorn all over me!"

 

"It wwas an accident!", I said.

 

He glared at me.

 

"You wwhat? Wwe are just going to leavve! Come on J-OH MY GOG!"

 

John was hunch over in pain, that brute punched him.

 

"John are you okay?"

 

"I-I'm fine! Lets go..."

 

I looked at my hand that was on his stomach, he was bleeding.

 

"Like HXLL you are! Your wound reopened!"

 

I glared at the brute. He was clearly confused with the other people in the theater.

 

"He just got out of the hospital, you moron!"

 

"What!?"

 

"Why was he in the hospital?"

 

"He got shot wwhen his house got broken into! This is assault! As an officer of the laww, I am going to arrest you!"

 

The brute is clearly scared.

 

"Y-you are a police officer!?"

 

"Yes, yes I am."

 

"Eridan, wait."

 

"WWhat is it John?"

 

"Please don't, he is a nice guy really. He didn't mean it."

 

I am now flabbergasted.

 

"Wwhat? You're defending him!?"

 

"You're Equius right?"

 

"Uh...yes, That is me. How did you know my name?"

 

"Nepeta talks about you."

 

"You know Nepeta!?"

 

"Yeah, me and her RP together. She's a good friend of mine."

 

John's glasses fall and he collapses.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------

 

After that mess, John got better. We drove to Sol's again and me and John told funny stories on the way.

 

\-------------------------

 

**BYE.**


	7. John POV

\---------------------

Okay, so I have a few secrets. Don't we all? Like, for instance.....I know it was Nepeta and Vriska who broke in and shot me. I don't think they know it was me, they were robbing. If they did, they wouldn't of done it in the first place. They must of heard the rumors. That a child of the Betty Crocker industries was living in this town. That, that kid will inherit billions.

 

I'm John Egbert and I was adopted by my aunts mother. Who was trying to figure out how to split the money between me and her. 

 

My aunt is Jane Crocker, she likes to shower me in affection. It is suffocating to say the least. With my adopted mother, it is worst. When I lived with her, she was over protective. Her other daughters had to drag her a way so I could take a bath my self. I am not a fragile doll. I can take care of my self.

 

So when I said I wanted to move out.....they all barricaded me in my room. I wasn't aloud to leave it. They would, bring food in and sleep in my room. My skin got so pale, I could pass as a ghost. So.....I ran a way. Then I met some friend. I moved into a house I had inherited, that my family didn't know about.

 

Sorry, you're probably wondering why I was adopted in the first place. Well...That's because-

\--------------------------------------------------------------

"John, wake up. we're at your house.", said Sollux.

 

I get up and get out of the car. I move to take some of the luggage. Eridan stops me, he gets in my way.

 

"Oh no you don't. You're not going to carry anyfin. You are still recovvering."

 

"But-"

 

"No butts. John, just let us do iit. Go iinsiide and get some rest. @ssface and II got thiis."

 

I comply with no further complaint. Quietly I go to my room. I go to sleep, It was not pleasant. By the time I woke up, I was shaking and Sollux was looming over me trying to calm me down. Eridan had a glass of water in his hand to give to me. I sat up and took it.

 

"Are you okay? You wwere shaking pretty bad."

 

I nodded. They looked at each other and shrugged.

 

"Ariight, but iif you need anythiing. We are here."

 

"Okay."

 

"Wwhale, I don't knoww about you guys. But I'm starvvin."

 

"C'mon John. Let's get you some breakfast. You were a sleep for two days. We were gettiing worriied you wouldn't.....wake up."

 

I muttered under my breath, "I wish."

 

"What?"

 

"Nothing, It's just...I could make it for you."

 

I stood up.

 

"I just need to go shopping."

 

"Don't wworry, wwe already restocked the shells."

 

"...That was bad."

 

"...Shut up."

 

\---------------------------------------------------------

 

I got to work and I ended up making crepes and omelets. They devoured it in seconds.

 

"S-sorry, John."

 

"Wwe didn't leave any for you...."

 

They look sad, not on my watch.

 

"Don't worry, I ate before you came in the kitchen.", I lied. I didn't eat anything. I never do, at the hospital. The doctor told me that if I didn't start eating myself. He said he will inform them and they will start making me eat.

 

.....

 

No. By the time they realize it, it will- was to late. I don't need to eat. I'm fine. 

 

"Reely?"

 

"Yeah, I had and omelet."

 

"You are a good cook John. Where diid you learn to cook so good?"

 

I tensed. They dropped the question and Eridan went to inform the police chief of my current status. Sollux and I were in the living room. I was watching the fish in the tank, Eridan's. Sollux was on his laptop and was playing a game.

 

\-------------------------------------------

 

"Ampora."

 

"Hello, Chief Pyrope."

 

"The current status of the boy?"

 

"WWhale, Sir. He was shaking violently in his sleep. WWe had to wwake he up evventually. He is an excellent cook by the wway."

 

"I see..."

 

She thought for a moment.

 

"You may leave now."

 

"Yes Sir."

 

\------------------

 

**Bye!**


	8. Story time~

\-------------------------

Later Eridan came back with some take out. They all sat in the living room and on the couch. On the TV was the news, it was taking about the Batter- I mean Betty Crocker and her big corporation. They were trying to interview her again.

 

No such luck, she won't talk.

 

"Man, she has got to have some shady dealiings. II mean seriiously, she iis so popular for a bakiing company. She's even iin SPORTS channels."

 

"What if she is? You have no power...", murmured John.

 

"What?"

 

"Hum?"

 

"Never miind."

 

"Hey, Sol."

 

"What?"

 

"Remember wwhen wwe had to catch a car theft?"

 

Eridan said trying to impress John and humiliate Sollux in the process.

 

"Yeah, we almost got fiired because II had to save your @ss from becomiing a hostage."

 

"Shut the hxll up! That's not howw it wwent!"

 

"Really? Your memoriies suck @ss!"

 

They started to bicker and shout. Standing up they lunged at each other. Forgetting John was in between them. He was losing air.

 

"P-Please stop....."

 

They ignored him and pushed him to the side. They took to fight and the living room was becoming a mess. John was in a corner with his head down, shaking. Suddenly they stop hearing loud sobs. They look at John in panic and shock.

 

"John....", said Sollux.

 

"D-don't yell...st-stop please...no...no..."

 

"John?", said Eridan.

 

He was having a panic attack and they were getting worried.

 

"John, please calm down.", said Sollux.

 

Sollux went to get some water and Eridan crouched down next to him. He rubbed his back in circles. Whispering comforting words.

 

John quiet it down a little and rested his head on Eridan's shoulder. Eridan's was wet with tears. Sollux came back and gave him the water. They gave him a little time to breath.

 

"A-are you okay now?", said Sollux.

 

John said nothing and kept his head down, he nodded a little. They sighed in relief.

 

"Okay, good...do you...wwant to talk about it?"

 

"...."

 

No response.

 

"How about we talk about our selves?", said Sollux.

 

"...."

 

No response.

 

"Okay, II wiill go friist. II liike bees and have two eye colors. II am a hacker and II thiink II kiilled my giirlfriiend, II don't know where her iis. My dad's name iis Piisoniic and my brother iis Miituna. He had an acciident. Shxt face, you're next.", said Sollux.

 

He turned to Eridan.

 

"Fine. I like marine animals and the beach. I am one of the best shooters on the force and I don't....have a gill frond."

 

"Yeah, he driives them all a way by beiing a douche bag.", said Sollux.

 

"Shut up!!!!", said Eridan.

 

"Anywways, My dad's name is Duelscar and my brother is Cronus.", said Eridan.

 

They looked at John.

 

"....I like the piano."

 

"And?", said Eridan.

 

"I like my dad."

 

They sighed, he won't talk. If they want to fine out what's wrong with him, they will have to be patient.

 

"How about we go to bed, huh?", said Sollux.

 

John nodded and they cleaned up the place. John insisted on helping with their bruises and cuts. It stung, but have too. He won't take no for an answer.

 

"Owwe Owwe Owwe Owwe That's hurts!", said Eridan.

 

"Quiit complaiiniing and suck iit up. He iis doiing thiis for us, now be niice.", said Sollux.

 

Eridan grunted in displeasure. John finished and got up.

 

Going separate ways, they went to sleep.

 

\-----------------------------------------------------

 

**BYE!**


	9. Nightmares

\---------------------------------

I'm running in a forest, it's dark and it had recently rained. All I remember is waking up in a dusty old house with dried up blood. I was covered in it. How long have I slept? I don't know.

 

I heard whispers and echos. Then I was hit by something dark and dripping. 

 

**Black Ink.**

 

I crashed through the window and glass cut me. So here I am, running into the void of the forest.

 

What am I running from?

 

I can't tell. All I know is it wants me dead.

 

It lashes at my legs and cut one in half. I fall and roll to the side into more mud. I try to crawl a way as it gets closer.

 

**Woof.**

 

I turn my head just to be shot. A red tear rolls down it's messed up face. It's grin is more somber as it opens it's mouth to eat. I then wake up. 

 

\----------------------------------------

 

I sit up and look a round my room. Empty, a plate of cold food next to me. I pick it up and dump it out side. Out the window, it is bright. I close the blinds. I look at my computer, but I re frame from using it again. Instead I go down stairs. Someone is in the living room.

 

Living?

 

Ha.

 

A place I do not belong. For I am already dead.

 

Sigh.

 

It's all so bleak.

 

Perhaps, I am still dreaming and when I enter the room. I will be tormented by the rapid flashes.

 

Light is a mocking hope. Tomorrow is never and today is always. 

 

The misery never ends.

 

\------------------------------------------------------

 

"Hey, John."

 

"Yes?"

 

"Diid you have a good nap?"

 

He shrugged and put a plate in the sink. Sollux finished telling him that Eridan had to visit someone today so they can just hang out together.

 

"It's fine, I was just going to go meet up with someone."

 

"Okay, go a head. II'm just going to play thiis viideo game."

 

\------------------------------------------------------------------

 

John went to a cemetery. There he walks up to a mas ilium. He enters, a girl is sitting next to the cast inside. He sits with her. They speak nothing and she hands him a flower. It never wilts, yet it is alive. He takes a petal and he kisses her on the forehead. Thanking her, he leaves eventually. A ghostly smile on her face and then she is gone as is the mas ilium.

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

He is then at a cliff next to the ocean. He closes his eyes and whispers a few words. The petal drops and the white color turns red as it hits the water and flouts away. He smiles and a black tear steams down his face.

 

\--------------------------

 

"Hey, I'm back. WWhere is John?"

 

"He iis iin kiitchen."

 

"Okay."

 

\----------------------------------------------

 

They had chicken and baked potatoes.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------

 

**BYE~**


	10. John POV again

\---------------------------

I am sitting in the living room with Sollux and Eridan. They are arguing over the remote. I sighed and walked out of the room.

 

"Where are you goiing?", said Sollux.

 

"My room...."

 

"Okay, night.", said Eridan.

 

\---------------------------------------

 

In my room, I look out the window. Maybe if I....no....I don't want to put my lifeless body on their hands.

 

"I wonder how dad is doing...."

 

He's probably happy without me.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------

 

I have a flash of pain.

 

My darkness is seeping out again.

 

The negative feelings burn me like boiling water. The voices that whisper words razor sharp with jagged edges. I find my self bleeding. Bleeding? From where? 

 

I reach out to my face and the crimson liquid is leaking from my mouth. Am I puking blood again? Not the first time that happened. The gods of the world had cursed me.

 

My life is before me, Out of reach but teasingly close.

 

\-----------------------------

 

I write in my little book again. My little book with the **words:** _Dairy_ on the top. I wrote many things and drew many pictures in it. One of my favorite pages is the one where I wrote in my own blood. The words were....

 

_**DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE** I **HATE** MY SELF. WHY DO I BOTHER? WHAT IS THE POINT OF BEING HERE IF I JUST CAUSE **PAIN**? I HAVE HURT TO MANY I WANT TO **KILL** MY SELF._

 

I even keep a small vile of my own blood to write with and a big feather pen. I tuck it a way in a box under my bed with other items in the box.

\---------------------------------------------------

 

I told my ghost friend about it and she hugged me for a really long time. I knew she understood. She understands a lot. Her and her family are all big understanders.

 

I decided to go to bed for a while.

 

...

 

I had another nightmare.

 

They never stop. They stopped once...

 

But I don't want to talk about that. 

 

\-------------------------------------------

 

I went out side in the back yard. I went up to the old tree house I had and hid in there for three hours. By the time I came out, I was numb. Like a zombie, I walked into the house and played the piano. I spent the rest of the night playing the piano. I felt nothing. My hands just moved and I couldn't hear what I was playing. I think I might have also been singing I'm not sure...

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Sollux and Eridan then came down stairs to check out the morose music and saw John. He was moving his hands rapidly on the piano keys. They stared at him, he was pale and looked like an angel in the moon light. His voice was out of this world. The song it self was sad and John's voice was so soft. They seem to be crying now.

 

_The light washed a way by the shore, the more I count the more I seem to fade. The pure white color I wear is stained._

 

_I'm drowning in the black waters in my subconscious. I'm unconscious, I'm unaware of my surroundings._

 

_Drip Drip Drip What is that? Why is it coming out of my eyes?_

 

_Where is everyone else in this empty world? 2x_

 

_Who is that staring back? Is that my Reflection?_

 

_My reflection..._

 

_My distress is this maddening world full of black pearls._

 

_Where is the lovely transparent people who seem to float in the air? I wonder if I could join them?_

 

_Would they mind another lost soul?_

 

_Or am I to vile, to gruesome to behold?_

 

_It seems I can't not be forgiven. My sin is to great to bare._

 

_The sin of just being there....._

 

When he finished, it was already morning and Sollux and Eridan need to get ready for work. They dab their eyes and pat John on the head.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------

 

Oh my, I wasn't  aware that they were a wake. I wonder how long they have been there? Oh well, it seems they are to take their leave soon. Better make them something to eat.

 

"Lunch."

 

I say as I hand them their lunch bags. They smile and tell me good bye. I wave and go back to the kitchen to finishing cleaning the dishes. Then I go to the living room to watch TV. There is nothing on. I do nothing for the next twelve hours. Eridan then calls to tell me, they will be late. 

 

"Better make them dinner for when they come back...."

 

Are they going to come back? I never had someone stay as long as they do before. I guess I could see some old friends today. I rarely ever leave the house. It takes me a moment to stand. I don't ever eat anything, so it's hard to do anything. I don't have any strength to stand let alone walk.

 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

I visit my friend Kankri first, it seems he is at work today. He works at soup kitchen for homeless people and of the such. 

 

"Taking the night shift?"

\--------------------------------------

 

**BYE~**


	11. Friends are nice....

\----------------------

While John is busy with Kankri, lets see what's up with our cop buddies!

 

\-------------------------------

 

_BANG BANG BANG_

 

"Oh gog run!!! I mean DRIVE FASTER!!!!"

 

_BANG BANG_

 

**CRASH**

\--------------------------------------

 

Well that doesn't sound good...

 

Rewind the tape?

 

 ***Yes**   No

 

\--------------------------------------

 

Sollux and Eridan where walking in the office with a coffee in their hands.

 

"Hey, Chiief.", said Sollux.

 

"Officer Captor, FishBxtch."

 

"Hey! I am a respectabubble officer of the laww!"

 

"And I am the boss of you. Now go get me a snack from the snack machine."

 

"Fine...."

 

Eridan had been bored, this whole morning was dull and nothing happened. Until a gang fight had been reported. 

 

\-----------

 

"Alright, when they are altogether, we jump them."

 

They all nodded and waited.

 

\----------------------------

 

It went south when they didn't realize how many members there was. A few wounded and a few dead. The police got chased out.

 

Now to where we are in the present day.

 

\--------------------------------------------

 

I want to see how John is doing. How about you?

 

[YES] [HECK YES] [DEFINITELY] **[ABSOLUTELY]**

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------

 

Kankri watches John play the piano for the people in the soup kitchen. They love to hear him play.

 

"Thank you, John."

 

"No problem, Kankri."

 

They smile at each other. John's doesn't really reach his face and Kankri slightly frowns at this. He ruffles John's hair. He blushes and looks in John's eyes.

 

"John, would you like to come over to my house?"

 

"Your house? You've never been to my house either."

 

"Do you want to go to your house?"

 

"No."

 

"Then we can uh...play video games at mine."

 

"You have video games? Like what?"

 

"Oh, well. They're not mine, but I'm sure my little brother won't mind sharing."

 

\----------------------------------------------

 

Karkat gets home tired, collage sucks. He trudges to the kitchen to get something to eat. He smells something in the oven.

 

"Is that a pie?"

 

"Yep."

 

Karkat turns a round and sees his dad. He was smiling with stars in his eyes. It kind of crept him out.

 

"Dad, what's with that look?"

 

"Your brother brought home a friend!"

 

Karkat rolls his eyes. Crossing his arms with an unimpressed look.

 

"He brings home friends surprisingly a lot."

 

"But this one is cute!"

 

Karkat gave him a questioning look.

 

"Just find out for your self and don't be mad, but I borrowed your bike....It got trashed. Your brother also borrowed you video games, Bye!"

 

He walked out the door. Karkat twitched.

 

_"WHAT?"_

 

\----------------------------------

 

**BYE!**


	12. Karkat Vantus

\------------------------------------

-POV

\--------------------------------------

I fxcking come home from the backdoor in the kitchen and smell something so gosh darn mouth watering. Thinking that today might get better. Collage _sucks eggs_. My Advanced Chemistry Professor gave us a surprise " _quiz_ ". More like fxcking _75 short essays_ test. Seriously, 75 short essays? Is she _trying_ to kill us?

 

But then my darn dad comes in all smiles like _usual_ and tells me _he crashed_ my bike? **_What the heck?_ ** I know he feels bad about it and will either get me a new one or fix it...Okay there is no fixing that. What did he do? _Tie it to the end of a massive truck and speed through rocky gosh darn mountains? Or what, put it through a trash compactor?_

 

Sigh...I can't stay mad at him for long. At least until mom comes back from her business trip in Africa. He misses her and won't stop whining about it. I don't see why she had to take my sisters with her. At least their having fun I guess.

 

Oh fxck, Forgive me. I started to _fxcking rant_ before fxcking _introducing my elf_. I'm **Karkat fxcking Vantus** and I am 19 years old, almost 20. I have messy black hair and black eyes. I have insomnia and _slight_ anger issues. Okay, maybe **a lot** of anger issues. But that is besides the point.

 

Right now, I'm charging into the living room to yell at my big brother for using my video games.

 

" **Dxmn it, Kankri-** ", my eyes widen.

 

My yell was cut short when I saw someone I've _never met before_ was sitting on the couch reading a book with a game paused. They look frazzled since they didn't know I was going to suddenly slam into the room **guns a blazing** like that. The first thing I notice is their face. Wide sparkling blue eyes and red cheeks. Messy obsidian hair and large square glasses. They look a little on the young side and porcelain pale skin. Second thing I noticed is how **skinny** they really are. That _doesn't_ look healthy.

 

After a second of awkward silence, they look a little scared from my outburst. _Crxp._

 

"Um....Sorry?", I said, but that sounded more like a question.

 

They don't said anything and continue to try to lean back like their trying to get as far a way from me as possible. My face gets a little red from embarrassment.

 

"I...uh...I'm Karkat. Kankri's brother."

 

"..."

 

"..."

 

"...H-Hi..."

 

_Shxt._ Their voice is so soft, like they don't use it often. It's... **cute**. Then I remember, they are _still scared_ and try to make a conversation to calm them down.

 

"So...your a friend of my brother. Why? It not often that people can stand being a round him. I can't stand being a round him and I've lived with him for years."

 

They smile slightly, not really reaching their face. At least I got them to be slightly okay. I guess....

 

"He's nice, just talks a lot. He forgets to let other people talk sometimes and ends up lecturing. At least he's very helpful when getting people to go to sleep. Like when there are small kids at the soup kitchen that needs a nap. He can just talk to them and almost everyone is a sleep!"

 

They then blush and lower their head.

 

"S-sorry, I'm talking to much aren't I? Oh! And uh...I'm John by the way. John Egbert. Nice to meet you..."

 

I frown slightly, I don't think they were talking that much...but moving on. I take a step forward slowly.

 

"Nice to meet you too."

 

Then my brother comes in.

 

"John, I- Oh, Karkat! Hello, I see you've met John. I hope you don't mind but I borrowed one of your video games to play with John!"

 

\-------------------------------

 

I tell Kankri off slightly, so I don't scare John again. They seem a little jumpy. Especially with my first impression with them. They probably think I'm always yelling and angry- **which is sort of true but still**. I can be calm _sometimes_.

 

After that, I watch them finish the game they're playing so I can join in. The game was a _horror game_. Once in a while, we'd have to pause the game to help John breathe. They would Hyperventilate.

 

Later, Dad took John home so they won't be late for dinner.

 

"What the actual fxck, Kankri?"

 

He frowned and sighed.

 

"He said could handle it. That he really wanted to play it."

 

"And you _believed_ that? You **saw** them! They were **scared** and they were _crying_ , Kankri. **Crying**. What is wrong with you?"

 

" I know that! But, he would have be mad at me and stubbornly refuse not to play anything else if I didn't let him play."

 

" _Seriously_ , if you knew they were going to have a **panic attack** then you should have said no. Where is your backbone!? You dumb butt!!!"

 

I stomp a way from him in anger before I strangle him. Taking my game with me and slammed my door shut.

 

\----------------------------

 

**BYE~**


	13. Nepeta Lejion

\---------------------------

 

Hello, Nepeta Lejion here! I am twenty three years old and almost six feet tall, like my best friend Equius. Who is six feet and eights inches.

 

My family doesn't know I went home early, except my mother and sister. I told them I wanted to go home, because I was this close to dying. That rhino was way to close for comfort. I love animals I really do, but I am not going to die just because a tourist wants a picture with wild animals.

 

My mom couldn't send my dad a heads up. The service there sucked. So when I got back home, it will be a surprised. But....

 

I did not go home the minute I got back.

 

Why?

 

Because, I want to stay out of the way. The last conversation I had with one of my brothers was not a happy talk. I cried. A lot. I just want to make sure he isn't mad at me any more. He has a bad temper.

 

\-------------------------------------

 

Anyways, I am currently sleeping at my friend, Vrisk's house. It was nice of her to let me crash here. I would stay at Equius's if he didn't have a water leak. Yeah, he is having some problems. His continuously bashing the wall down has caught up to him. He has to live with his Ex at the moment and it is very awkward.

 

"Hey, Nepeta. Do you want to do something exciting?"

 

"Sure, Vriskers! Why did you have in mind?"

 

"Now, I want you to listen and don't interrupt me when I say this........"

 

"Okay...."

 

"Let's break into a house!"

 

"No, that's bad."

 

"Hear me out!!!!!!!!"

 

"Fine...."

 

"Gr8!"

 

\------------------------------------------------

 

So Vriska explained to me that we will be breaking into a rich kids house. The kid lives alone and is one of the kids of the Batter witch.  Why did I agree to this again?

 

The Batter witch is cold blooded, but touch what is hers and you are never seen again.

 

The only reason I am doing this is to make sure Vriska can get out in time. I mean, she needs someone to keep an eye out while she loots. So I did.

 

Now We are in trouble.

 

I am a horrible friend.

 

\-------------------------------------------------

 

**Some time after the attempt of theft...**

 

Nepeta and Vriska are watching TV, when Nepeta's phone rings.

 

"Hello?"

 

_Nepeta._

 

"Hey, John! Long time no see! How did you know I was back?"

 

_Equius._

 

"You met Equius? Is he with you now?"

 

_No, I'm at home._

 

"Hey, what's that noise in the back?"

 

_Just some cops playing video games._

 

"Cops?"

 

When she said cops, Vriska dived to the floor and freaked out.

 

"Why are there cops at your house, John?"

 

_Some people tried to rob me and I was shot._

 

"What, are you okay?"

 

_Yeah, I'm fine. Can you tell Vriska, she needs to aim better? Honestly, I thought she was better than that. Whale, I have to go. Bye!_

 

"..."

 

Nepeta hung up with a devastated look on her face when she turned to Vriska.

 

"Nepeta, what's up? Is John okay? What happened?"

 

"You tried to shot him."

 

"What....?"

 

"Vriska, do you know anything about John's family?"

 

"No. Just that he doesn't like them."

 

"Vriska....John is related to the Batter Witch."

 

"....Oh crxp."

 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------

 

**BYE~**


	14. The batter tastes sweeter when it's dead.

\-----------------

John sits on a bench in the park one day. It's cloudy and gloomy. 

 

"Just like me...."

 

He whispers to himself. Then he hears someone walk up to him.

 

"Equius."

 

"Ah....hello...."

 

"John."

 

"John. I...wanted to apologize...for my rude behavior."

 

"It's alright, you didn't know."

 

"But still! I had meant you harm, and I didn't even know you! If it wasn't for the fact you knew Nepeta....I could have hurt you....and I did..."

 

John smiled gently at him and patted a seat next to him. Equius sat down.

 

"Don't beat your self over it. You can do better next time."

 

"Thank you, but I...would rather be comforted by my friend not...."

 

"I understand. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

 

Equius frowned, seeing how kind John is, makes him feel an uneasy feeling in his gut. Most likely guilt...

 

"Perhaps I could do something to make it up to you?"

 

"Hmm....You don't really need to do that."

 

"But!"

 

"Sigh....fine, if you insist..."

 

"I do."

 

"Then....there is one thing..."

 

Equous perked up at that.

 

"Yes?"

 

"I would like to have a gift delivered to someone."

 

"I will do it."

 

"Are you sure?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Okay...."

 

\--------------------

 

Your name is _Equius Zahawk._

 

You are making a delivery for someone very kind. You feel bad for lashing out at them. They had apologizes and you hurt them.

 

Looking back, you realized how small they were and fragile! You could have killed them! Oh no....they were even friends with Nepeta....you are a horrible person and friend....

 

Sighing, you walk up to the large home. You briefly wonder why and what John's connection to... _.Her?_

 

"Yes?"

 

"I have a delivery for you."

 

"...is...is this from...?"

 

"This is from someone named John."

 

"His last name?"

 

"....Egbert."

 

"OH MY GOG!? MOM!!!!"

 

"What?"

 

"John sent us something!"

 

"What!? Open it up!"

 

Inside the box I have been carrying was...

 

A cake and a letter...

 

 

_Dear family,_

 

_Are you happy now? I am gone and you have moved on. I knew this was a good idea. I am a free bird and you don't have to worry about me at all! I hope you are all doing okay. I have lots of friends. Tell this stranger, thank you. Don't bother questioning him, he knows nothing and he lives far from where I do. I made sure you couldn't find me and you will never find me. I am only contacting you now, because....I won't ever see you ever again. I'm making sure you understand that. I was never happy with you...I'm sorry...._

 

_Love,_

 

_John Egbert._

 

\----------------------

 

Equius had left the sobbing women with a nervous sweat. It was really.....weird.

 

Is John really related to such powerful women?

 

That was...

 

Jane Crocker and The Batter Witch, her self.

 

**Jane- Powerful second heiress to the Crocker company.**

 

**HIC- The owner of said company and others.**

 

\-----------------

 

The Condesce paced a round her office. Thinking hard.

 

The person who delivered the cake was none other than Equius Zahawk. His father owned a large horse farm, and a mechanic's collage. A successful robotic's technician. The programming isn't every strong, but it's still impressive.

 

Equius, himself was reported to live a town or two down from her home...Does that mean _he_ traveled not far from her? Does this mean he still cares?

 

She turned on her intercom and told her secretary to send for an investigator.

 

"I need you to find this person. I want them to be alive, when you report that you find them. I will not check up on you, because I want the next time you talk to me that you found them. Understand? If you report to me that they are dead, you will not be paid. If you never report to me, that means you never found them and I will hire someone else that can. Okay? Good."

 

\-----------------------

 

John is sleeping in his bed, when Eridan came in with a soft knock. John stirred.

 

He sat up and Eridan asked him, if he want to go to a theme park with him.

 

John nodded his head and Eridan left.

 

\---------------------------------------------

 

**BYE~**


	15. There is no Amusement in this Amusement Park

\---------------

John sits quietly in the car as Eridan drives to the Nameless Amusement Park he's never heard of. The music is off and Eridan tries to make small talk.

 

"So John...Howw are you doing? The wwounds healing?"

 

"...."

 

"John?"

 

John turns his head slightly towards Eridan and doesn't quiet look him in the eye. I mean....He is driving, so he must keep his eyes on the road.

 

"I...am *Cough* fine. I....have been feeling b-better....", His soft voice slowly forces the words out.

 

\-----------

 

"Are you.....shore?"

 

"Yes....ah. You missed the turn."

 

"Crxp."

 

John chuckles softly, less his voice hurts.

 

\-------------------

 

The park had been.....a bit....shady......but the people didn't seem to mind. Laughter and bright face in many place and a few....bratty ones. Kids and their tantrums.

 

"Hey, John, wwant to ride this one?"

 

It was The Drop. People get strapped into chairs and then they go all the way to the top. The ride is so tall, that you can almost touch the clouds. Barely.

 

John considers for a moment, "Okay."

 

\--------------------------------------

 

Eridan threw up on the girl next to him and John frowned. When they got off, John rubbed Eridan's back as he continues to puke in the trash can.

 

"Let's....go....win prizes...."

 

"Sound-Puke-good to me.....ugh....."

 

\---------------

 

John tried to throw the small ball into a tiny ship net, that was above the ship, but the water kept shifting and he had been to short to get a good view of the moving ships.

 

"Better luck next time little miss!", The man grinned smugly down at him from his stool.

 

John wore a light blue shirt with white pants and black slippers. He had a white bow a round his neck with a bell.

 

"Excuse me, sir. But he is not a girl.", Eridan interrupted him with a slight glare.

 

"S-Sorry!", The man sweats, but John tugged Eridan's sleeve to usher him a way.

 

"John? Are you shore you are okay wwith-"

 

John simply nods and they go to the next booth. A large Miss with frizzy brown and blond hair sits with a magazine in her hands. John taps the front of the booth to get her attention. She peers down and over to see him. He hands her a dollar and she gives him five darts. He launches the first two and miss. The third hits and the fourth does not. The fifth does how ever and he picks out a piece of candy.

 

Eridan went to a booth with water guns and got a better prize. It was a tiny doll. It was a shell with a smile. He followed John until they got Pretzels. Well...Eridan did.

 

\-------------

 

**BYE~**


End file.
